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Miami Design Agenda knows that is a lot to do and find in Miami. Still we feel like it’s our responsibility to bring you up-to-date on Miami’s ever-changing gentlemen’s club scene. Take a look at the best strip clubs in Miami !
Best Club to Watch a Game: Tootsie’s
There are times — like the first three and a half quarters of every NBA game ever — when the game is pretty meaningless and you need a nice distraction. Tootsies’ll give you the best distractions ever but still let you catch the game on one of their 30 gigantic plasma screens. Just don’t get TOO distracted or you’ll have a hard time answering when your girlfriend asks you who won.
Best Club if You’re Tired of Getting Hassled to “Tip me For My Dance”: Wonderland
“No, Trinitee, I didn’t see your dance”, is a phrase you’ll never have to use at this 50s-burlesque-joint done up in South Beach neon, since the girls get fired for doing that. The downside is it’s only topless, but the peace and quiet is worth the (relatively) limited view.
Best Club to Have Lunch: Showgirls, Inc.
You know what goes great with a hot naked girl dancing on a pole? Ok, a lot of things… but the only one we can talk about is chicken sandwiches. Which are awesome here and totally FREE Monday-Friday if you buy a beer for the extremely-reasonable-for-strip-clubs price of $5.
Best Club to Learn How to Fake a Russian Accent: Club Madonna
Much as you’d like to believe it really is Mikhaila’s first night at work since she moved here from Minsk two weeks ago, her name’s actually Kelly and she’s been working there since the 90s. Believe us.
Best Club to See a Rapper or Pro Athlete Make it Rain: King of Diamonds
There’s a lot of awards the venerable KOD could have won. Best Pole Dancers. Best Club to Watch a New Times Columnist do Said Pole Dance. Best club to Get a Haircut. But when a place is mentioned in every single Lil Jon song ever and has a full basketball court in case the Portland Trail Blazers decide to stop by, awarding it anything else would be…waitforit….Krazy.
Have a nice day 🙂